We give and receive love in ways that aren’t always apparent to others or even ourselves. Certain love languages appeal to some more than others, but it doesn’t mean the rest of them are completely irrelevant. For each person, the 5 love languages are ranked in order of importance, some people even score equally in five of them!
The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts is an extensive analysis of these love languages. Dr. Gary Chapman, the author of the book, explains the different ways we show love and interact with others. Even though the book is geared towards married couples, these are skills that anyone can use to strengthen the bond between family and friends.
The 5 love languages are: quality time, words of affirmation, gifts, acts of service, and physical touch.
Here are some examples of how we give love:
- Quality Time: providing someone with undivided attention and being interested in the details of their lives
- Words of Affirmation: speaking words that support and nurture the other person
- Gifts: expressing their love by giving gifts, to show that they are thinking of you
- Acts of Service: being helpful and don’t mind doing favors for others
- Physical Touch: interacting with their body more, whether it’s touching your arm when they’re talking to you or just randomly giving you a hug
And here are some examples of how we receive love:
- Quality Time: spending one-on-one time with you is important to them
- Words of Affirmation: sentimental things like cards and letters are appreciated and cherished
- Gifts: receiving gifts that are super personal and thoughtful or just to randomly let them know they were thinking of you
- Acts of Service: appreciates when people take the time to do things for them or help them out (actions speak louder than words)
- Physical Touch: hugging and being physically close to someone helps them feel emotionally close to you
Some love languages come more naturally than others, you don’t necessarily have to be fluent in all five love languages, just knowing what they are can help ease the dreads of miscommunication.
You can figure out what your primary love languages are by taking the quiz here: http://www.5lovelanguages.com/